Sweet Lucille (Potential Office Romance) From my first day on the job, I loved Lucille We’d work together but my feelings were concealed For two straight years, I’d go nuts from her perfume Seemed like 5 o’clock always came too soon She used to work in the cube right next to mine But found a West Coast job and moved to Anaheim She said she’d been in New York long enough This potential office romance bit the dust We’ve got telephones, fax machines, and brand, new shiny staplers Paper clips, rubber bands, and letter-size paper Morning cups of coffee and hangers for our coats The only thing missing from this office is sweet Lucille There were some days, I would rush to get to work I’d work the weekends if it meant that I would see her Now I get real sad when I see her empty desk Why did I keep my love for her suppressed? I hear that Management would frown upon such things Because of all the legal nightmares it could bring They were afraid of sexual harassment But a romance with Lucille would’ve been fantastic This office is now just some place to earn my income And a breeding ground for carpel tunnel syndrome It’s too late for me to act on my crush This potential office romance has bit the dust We’ve got mouse pads, keyboards, and 14-inch monitors Interoffice envelopes and toner for the copier Laser printer cartridges and yellow sticky notes The only thing missing from this office is sweet Lucille We’ve got swivel chairs, keyboard trays, and all things ergonomic Ball-point pens and coffee mugs with corporate logos on them Lucille is really what this office needs the most Yeah, the only thing missing from this office is sweet Lucille ©2005 Michael B. Nahmias